Monday, February 21, 2011

5 Little Monkeys

I know you all know the song about 5 Little Monkeys jumping on the bed. Yes, you will be singing it most of the day to yourself, sorry. When Anna and I are in the car I find we sing a lot of songs together. My days of listening to the radio blasting are sadly over but they are replaced with talking with my daughter which is so much better.

Last week we had to see GYN doctor in Manhattan for my Mother. I find it hard to believe that it has been six months since her uterine cancer was removed. When we first started going to Sloan-Kettering when Anna was home only for a couple of weeks the days were long. We would leave the house at 5 am and not return until close to 9 pm. Part of it was the drive the other part was she had to see many different specialist along with multiple tests. With each visit my Mother would say "I have a new grand baby, she is adopted from Russia." So many of the doctors who we have visited with know about Anna but have never met her.

Now that the dust seems to be settling with my Mother's health there are some shorter trips. On these shorter trips I have decided to take Anna with us. Anna dazzled the doctor by putting together a 100 piece puzzle while we waited for him to review my Mother's films and test results. But that was not the funniest part of the visit.

Anna and I practiced saying "Hello Doctor" on the ride up. I want Anna to be polite. Addressing others when you meet them with eye contact and a greeting is the start. Well Anna looked him in the eye said "Hello Doctor" then busted into her version of Five Little Monkeys jumping on the bed. The doctor looked at me because with Anna's speech delay it can be difficult to understand what she is saying. I started to sing along. When it came to the part of the song that says...And the Doctor said...Anna pointed at the Doctor and insisted he sing along. He laughed, we all laughed.

So even though the day is long on the short trips, Anna has proven that she is okay going with us. I hope that we can include some fun times into our trips. I hope to be able to save up for tickets to see Lion King on Broadway after one of these appointments. When we first started going to Sloan-Kettering I never thought that Anna would be able to sit in the car that long in traffic or the waiting room. I never thought that she would allow me to listen to the doctor as he or she spoke about my Mother's condition. I just can not believe how much she has grown.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Where have I been?

Well I have been home and just plugging along in my daily routine.

When I first met Anna close to 2 years ago I used my brand new video camera to film her and I playing together. The type of camera I used was one that burns it to a DVD. I fully admit that I know very little about camcorders but I knew I wanted footage of Anna walking and talking. Over the months while I waited I would watch that video and it got me through knowing that one day I would get to watch her in person.

As many of you know once Anna got home things more then exploded in my house with my Mother getting sick, issues at work, the holidays and just getting used to being her Mother. Some how that video was lost. I suspect it was through out by mistake. I have been quite sad in knowing that this video is gone. I wanted to make a cool video to music that included footage from Moscow, Cheboksary and Anna and I at the orphanage.

To my surprise I was looking through my computer hoping to find something else and to my surprise I found the footage that I thought was lost on the disk that I think was thrown out. So this is the reason for my absence from my blog. My computer has been running very slow either from the number of pictures I have on the hard drive or perhaps a virus. Last week my nerves got the best of me and I packed up my computer to take to my friend who is a computer Wiz. He actually enjoys fixing them go figure.

My hope it that he will be able to get this video downloaded onto a DVD that I can pop into our player. I so badly want to see my little baby running around again, she has gotten to much bigger. I feel like the time is just slipping away from me and I want so badly to enjoy every minute.

I plan on asking Mike to put a small piece of her video on You Tube so I can embed it onto the blog. After all that is my goal for this year among many goals that I have set for us. So this is the explanation for no pictures and the lack of stories.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

The Plans are set!

For those of you who know me in real life I am sure that the one thing you would all agree upon is I tend to wear people out when I am excited about something. I am officially wearing out my friends at work with my up coming vacation. I just know the minute I walk out of the room they are thinking "thank goodness for the quiet" I am both a planner and a pretty spontaneous person if a person can be both. I love last minute trips, parties, get togethers but I also love the more planned and structured events that life has to offer. My dear friend Geralyn laughs at me because as much as she loves to stay at home is as much as I love to be busy out and about.

Last year at the drop of the hat I decided that Disney was the place we NEEDED to celebrate Anna's 3rd birthday. The trip was reasonable with the exception of the 10 day non expiring, park hopper, resort and water park tickets. I am still pretty sure that I have not confessed to Gerard the amount. I go with the theory he did not ask so why tell on that little purchase.

I know this is an over used line but our trip to Walt Disney World was magical. Anna had no idea where we were until we saw the first character. I am shameless and yes I let Anna watch all the Disney movies. She loves them and I do too. I do find it amazing that in each movie when the prince comes onto the screen she points and says "Daddy."

Anna's latest favorite is Beauty and the Beast. To be honest I had never seen this one before Anna was home. Yes, I knew who Belle was and the general story but I never saw the movie. I will also admit that I became a little teary eyes the other day when Gerard walked in during the last 5 minutes of the movie because as usual Anna called him straight over to hold her.

As Belle and the Beast started to dance in the final scene Anna grabbed his hand and made him dance with her in the kitchen. She insisted that he twirl her around and sway back and forth, all while she was doing her best to sing to him the song that was playing. I could not help to picture the day that one day she may get married and he will dance with her in her wedding gown. I think he even got a little choked up.

Gerard's Father I think was a little sad that we took Anna to Disney without him the first time. I am not defending my choice but at times I felt like my little family (Gerard, Anna and I) were not clearly defined and I needed our family vacation to be just us. I also think that when you become a parent later in life you might need a little bit more time to adjust to your new normal life. Change is hard after all.

We have also been trying our best to live up to my New Year's Resolution of eating dinner at home as a family. In our dinning room is a picture of the three of us in front of the castle. I set the table, call them in to sit down and like clock work Anna looks over to the picture and says "Anna go Florida...there...castle...Mickey" This has been going on for weeks. I have broken under the pressure.

I booked Disney for her birthday again! As much as I loved our last trip this trip will be a little different because I have time to book the character meals that we want to do. I have also decided we are going to stay in Disney again. We booked with the meal plan so I feel like I know how much I need to save for the trip. I have also booked rooms for Gerard's parents and my Mother. We decided that instead of gifts for all the holidays this year we will put towards their trip to Disney with us.

I know Gerard's Father will be overcome with emotion when he sees how excited she is to see the characters. I struggled with the thought of booking the trip for my Mother because between the heat and the walking this will be a very difficult trip for her to make but then I asked myself if not now then when? So she is going as well.

Little do they know I will be packing their days full of fun and exciting things to do while we are there. Here is the funny thing about this, my friends think they are all crazy to even consider going to Disney with me! I know it will be a great time and we will be able to make wonderful memories too. Have I said how lucky I feel?

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

She is perfect...(Prayer request)

"She is perfect" were words that I used when I stood in front of the judge in Cheboksary during my court hearing. At first, I saw the Orphanage Director's face drop a little bit. Through the interpreter I explained that I fully understood Anna's medical history. I understood what each and every medical condition she had was and what I could potentially be faced with in the future. I had each diagnosis memorized. Anna was very small about 19 lbs at 2 years old, size 3 toddler shoes were big on her. If I had used an international adoption doctor I am certain that I would have been recommended to pass on this referral based on her size. Even today Anna remains small and is now just fitting into size 2T clothes and we have just moved up to a size 6 shoe.

These very words "She is perfect" can be the end of an adoption in terms of an international adoption from Russia. In order for a child to qualify for international adoption the child must have a medical condition or some type of disorder. I then explained to the judge what I meant when I said "She is perfect." What I meant was Anna was perfect for me because despite her challenges I already loved her. I told the judge she may not be perfect medically but in my eyes she is perfect. I then asked the judge "Shouldn't a Mother think her child is perfect no matter what their challenges are?" I looked at the Orphanage Director she had a very small smile on her face and looked away from the judge. It was after this explanation that my five hours court case ended.

Many prospective adoptive parents choose to have the medical information, video and pictures reviewed by an international adoption doctor. These doctors specialize in reading the medical information and spotting possible issues such as fetal alcohol spectrum disorder. I believe that you should never go into a situation with your eyes closed. But what about when you know there is a problem?

I did not have Anna's information reviewed by an international doctor. That was my choice. I believed that I would be able to tell whether or not she was a good referral on my own. This was risky but a risk I was willing to take. To be honest even if she was not as "perfect" as she was Gerard and I had already discussed that we were going to accept this referral for many reasons, the first being that if we had gotten pregnant we would not have the option of reviewing her medical information before she was born.

So why am I writing about this now? Well, last night I received an email from a reader. If I had the energy to answer it right then and there I would have but I was up sick much of the night which always shocks me when I am sick because I am NEVER sick. In this email I was told of a child who is currently in Russia and in need of a permanent home. Bethany told me this child has a disorder with the initials of EB or Epidermolysis Bullosa. My mind flashed instantly to a blog that I had read a couple of times before Anna came home. I remember praying for this little boy in the blog because at that point in time he was quite sick. I believe that Jonah has done so well because of the prayers that have been said for him and the special care that his parents give him everyday. Jonah's parents put his needs first but Anton does not have parents who are willing or perhaps able to do that for him. I am not judging his birth parents because I have not walked in their shoes.

Anton, the little Russian boy is being cared for in a Russian hospital but may soon be moved to an orphanage where he runs the risk of infections that could claim his life. From what I know of this disorder this condition is very painful. My heart aches for this child and all the other children who have this disorder. Here is what I am asking if perhaps you are considering adopting, please keep in mind that there is no perfect child out there just a child that could be perfect for you. Here are a few links that I was provided with about Anton.

A call for help First link.

Anton's Facebook page

After connecting to Jonah's blog I see that Anton has been accepted by Reese's Rainbow. If you would like to help with the expenses associated with helping Anton to be adopted this is a good way to donate. So here are the facts we need one good family for Anton and some funds to help defer the cost associated with his adoption. If a bunch of us donate to his adoption fund perhaps that family will surface faster. I plan on donating. I know of at least one other child who was adopted through Reese's Rainbow and perhaps you all do too. Dennis from Smiles and Trials

Anton's page on Reese's Rainbow

I think the most important thing that each and every one of us can do that is free is to include Anton in our prayers. We can pray for a family to step up and take him forever. We can pray for a cure for this disorder. We can pray that he stays free from pain.

Bethany thank you so much for emailing me.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Blue...Green...Red

First off Anna has had a virus and I have been so tired too. No real reason for not blogging but that we have all been tired.

As a child in the grocery store my younger sister would walk through the store and try and hop from one color to the next without touching the main color. With quite a bit of certainty I am sure this annoyed my Mother. Please remember that Jenny and I are number 5 and 6 so she had many years of these little games being played with she was busy trying to get some thing done in a hurry.

I will also admit that I can not walk through a grocery store without thinking about that game or the time I squirted liquid soap up Jenny's nose but that was an accident. How cool is it that Anna has started to play these little games too.

Here is how is started. Gerard picks up Anna when I sleep during the day from school. What is neat is he always tries to do some thing that she like for example he visits with his parents, takes her to walk on the sand beach by the bay to feed the seagulls, play ground. This is all fine and good but many of "his" activities are outside activities which become hard when you have so much snow on the ground.

So Gerard started to take to to the bank. I love a good drive through but Gerard hates drive through windows in pretty much every case. The process of taking Anna to the bank can be at least 30-40 minutes. All week long Gerard will save his change in a zip lock bag. He has never been a big spender of change. He keeps the standard mix of 3 quarters, 4 dimes and 3 nickels and 4 pennies in his pocket.

Yes I know it is a bit obsessive but if that makes the world right in his mind I really do not care. (Sorry off topic.) Anna LOVES change. She always has loved change. We have multiple piggy banks, some with no access to get the money back out and some that I have made with juice bottles. We even have piggy banks that talk.

So Gerard told me the other day that he is going to start to mix up which bank he goes to because Anna now can not drive past the bank without wanting to go. Which is funny but I found out the real reason is because now the minute he walks in with her she is like an ambassador, waving "Hi" to all the tellers and they even know her name. As a game while she waits she steps on the different colored pieces of flooring and yells out the color. No she is not usually right but she says it with confidence. Gerard is super shy and the fact that anyone knows his name or knows his routines is a little stressful to him. Anna is more like me I am guessing and does not care about that stuff.

Which brings me to the other day. I needed stuff in the grocery store, the carts were all wet so for the first time I let her walk in the store. Once she saw the floor her eyes lite up and the game started. Blue...red...green and each time looking at me to see if she was right. This made me laugh and I loved it. How did she learn this game all on her own? She amazes me every day.

Oh and they have saved close to 400 dollars this way which also amazes me.